Believing is Seeing

"I'll give you everything that I've got left, follow you down and give you my last breath".  ~ Gideon.

Many times I struggle with self worth and thinking that I am not up to anyone's standards.  Recently an opportunity has presented itself to me and I can't seem to get out of my own way.  I feel as if I am not good enough to do this new challenge, I feel like I can't live up to the expectation that has been set forth.  I seem myself as less than everyone and that is a serious struggle for me and really is the cause of most of my depression and anxieties.  I often times when in a group setting, think that people are looking at me like I am weird or something to that effect.  I feel as if people see me in a different light than who I truly am.  Once you get to know me, I promise it is worth your time :).  I am an introvert who doesn't like crowds or speaking to new people, but lately I have been trying to push past those barriers.  I recently watched a video on Youtube by Yes Theory and they had to help a stranger overcome their biggest fear.  When they finally found someone who was willing to go along with the idea, it was discovered that this individual has social anxiety and struggles with self worth as well.  He stated that he does not like talking to new people and well they ran with that idea.  So he had to high five random people and then ask them if he could help them overcome their fear and at the end he had to give a speech in front of a crowd of people.  Yea I would have walked away by then..  But the lesson here that was learned is that, yes you will fail and people are not always receptive of you, but in the end those people who are overshadow any failure you may have experienced.  You tend to forget the bad and focus on the good that has happened.  Now his fear may not be completely gone, but it was chipped away at just a little.  You could see the spark in his eyes when he realized that he could do it.  It warmed my introverted heart to see someone else succeed.  How often are you in a position that fear has stopped you from doing something you set your mind to do?  I ask the question of Why?  Why do we let something that we create, stand in the way of us living our lives to it's fullest potential?  In the end we are only here for a short amount of time and why would we live in a world of self doubt that only defeats us?  The quote above helps remind me that yes, you may be introverted (or extroverted) and you may have fears, but we are stronger than we can ever imagine. 

For today, be the person you dream of.  Take advantage of the fact that you are breathing and have life to live.  We often times just let life pass us by and we don't think about the fact that we may not have tomorrow.  Be the person your fear stops you from becoming.  Be the spark that starts a reaction in you that propels you in a new direction.  I know that at times it is difficult, but really in the end we are wasting away in a pool of self doubt and are restricting our freedom in this life.  Find your paradise at some point in your life and don't look back on how long it may have taken you to get there, but rather have the moment shine for you because you made it.