The Start

Hello world!!!!!  Well at least today I have the ability to at least feel somewhat happy.  I mean why would I not be happy, I woke up...  I have a beautiful family who loves me unconditionally and I am generally a happy person.  So now you must be wondering why I am writing this down for what could potentially reach the world.  Well that answer is simple, sometimes depression happens.  I work in a field that is very demanding, as a matter of fact I manage other people's healthcare, but sometimes it is tough to manage my own emotions let alone 200 different people's.  Such is life though, we all have to put up a false front a lot of times to just make it through the day.  However at the darkest times of my own self loathing (depression), I found that there was always a way out.  I know that for ages people say the same old thing of "oh there is a light at the end of the tunnel"...  Do you know how many times I have heard that, or a personal favorite of mine is the "it gets better".  Now I want to thank everyone who has said those kind words to me before, for if you do not have depression than you may not understand.  I get it, I really do but I feel that people should have an outpouring of support.  Let me explain:

Depression is a disease just like any other disease.  It is nasty, it is painful, it sucks... I want to punch it in the face every time it rears it's ugly head.  But since I cannot physically punch depression in the face, I have to resort to other means and the first one is being around my wife and child.  Those two have saved me, and when I say save me I do not mean in the sense that I was thinking about doing something harmful.  They saved me in the sense that yes, depression can occur and it will occur, but there are many things in this world to be hopeful about.  Seeing the smile on the face of my little one everyday when I get home is amazing and seeing the smile and loving embrace of my spouse is equally as amazing.

So for today let's try something a little different, instead of letting the negative thoughts come in and create an image of despair and hopelessness.  Let's look for something that brings you joy and that will help you overcome today's challenge.  I intend on keeping this blog going and if one person reads it and connects with the words and or story than it has done it's job.  The goal is to help those just like myself overcome something that is widely misunderstood and stigmatized.

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